I Wish it was Love
Someday’s I look at what I owe and it takes my breath away. Not like a lover you are excited to see, more like the archnemisis that wants to crush you.
It can feel so overwhelming when I step back and take it in. When I look at it all in one shot I realize the mountain I have created for myself to climb. However, I can live with that daunting task. I can take on that challenge.
What takes away my breath is that bill that shows up for $500 that I was not expecting. OMG, how will I do it? I’m running out of Peters to pay Paul. I thought I had enough on my irregular income and now I find out I don’t. I went from feeling good that I can make the money stretch to how the hell will I make it stretch.
Suddenly I’m fully aware of my deep breathing, my nostrils taking in as much air as they can. Calm myself. I must not panic.
I will make it work. I always do. I have no idea how, but I will.
Tomorrow brings new hope. Tomorrow the sun will rise and I will tackle this mountain again. I will win. Even if I must remind myself to breathe….